4 Keys to Resolve Your Biggest FightsDec 14, 2023
Do you feel like you hit a brick wall, whenever you try to talk to your partner about certain things? Are you tired of arguing about the same things, over and over? I wanted to quickly share with you 4 keys to resolve your biggest fights.
The first key is to remember that hurt people, hurt people… Your partner isn’t responding the way they are because they are selfish or mean. It’s because they’re hurt, broken and inexperienced. Viewing them through a lens of compassion, is a great first step to resolving the issue.
The second key is to be influenced before trying to influence. When we seek to understand, before we start blabbering, it shows our partner we’re genuinely HEARING them. Which causes them to let their guard down, cut the fluff, and say what they REALLY feel. Heck, sometimes just the act of trying to understand will end the argument!
The third key is to slow down and think through your response. When it comes to parking a car, landing an airplane, or performing a delicate surgery, slow and deliberate, is the best option. Same goes for our conversations. Before you respond. Take a deep breath, and be smart & deliberate about what you choose to say.
The final key is to go deeper in the conversation. Behind every argument there’s a deeper need that’s not being met. Instead of spending time fighting about the smoke, you and your partner can can make it easier for each other, by learning to communicate about what I call the STARVED Needs.
More on those STARVED needs can be found in our Becoming One Program. Where each week you get personal virtual coaching from me! Click below to learn more if you're interested!
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